4EVAJESSIE

How to calm the fxxx down

May 18, 2017 36 Comments

 

Do you ever feel so overwhelmed with life, people, things, stress … simply just an overwhelming feeling that feels like the sky is about to fall down on you and you desperately need a way out otherwise you won’t be able to breath? … Don’t worry, I have just the right solution for you, not saying it is the only solution, but it is definitely a very effective one.

 

So how do we calm the fxxx down and get our life back on track? First, we need to find the sources of the problem, often the overwhelming feelings are caused by 2 things: Anxiety and Depression. When our mind worries too much about the future, we tend to feel anxious, and often we get anxiety attacks when experiencing extreme scales. Depression, on the other hand, can be quite opposite of anxiety. We often fall into the depression hole when we lingering too much in the past and keep drilling down on the thoughts for something that has happened in the past, which we think might have impacted on our current life if we have done it differently. However, there is nothing we can do in the present moment to alter our past. What’s been done has already done. We also shouldn’t worry too much about the future for things that haven’t even happened yet. The only control we can have with full steer is the present moment. Being present helps us to regain control of our thoughts and be engaged. Therefore, we need to train our brain to pull our mind back to the present moment, when we are feeling anexious or depressed. So… how do we bring the mind to the present moment without dwelling down the past or worrying too much about the future?

 

My answer to that is – meditation. That’s no new concept to everyone. However, most of us also have doubts in the powerfulness of meditation. To honest, I personally didn’t believe in it, till I started practicing regularly this month and not just me have noticed the changes within me, but also the people around me have started noticing the glow on me from inside out. You might not have faith in meditation itself, but you should give it a chance to prove you wrong J

 

This post is not about teaching you how to meditate. There are many different ways to meditate and each one of us might have our own preferred method: you can either start with a group session, using one of those guided apps on your phone or just simply meditate on your own. I found the guided apps are probably the most accessible and easier to focus (There are a few popular ones like Headspace, Calm, Buddhify and Mindfullness, which you can download from the app store.) You can literally find a place anywhere, sit down, plug in your head phones and start to meditate, especially when you are going through some hot thoughts and desperately need to cool down; or when you need to regain your concentration back for work; or just simply need it to kick start your day. You may also choose to meditate during different times throughout the day. I personally found it is much easier to meditate in the morning for beginners like me. I found myself easier to focus and engage with the present moment when my mind is less clouded. I often find my mind filled with tasks that I need to complete and random thoughts about things happened during the day towards the end of the day, and therefore, I struggled a little to engage with present moment when I tried to meditate before bedtime. So I decided to schedule 30 minutes of my morning time, right after I rise from my bed each morning to meditate. It also helps me to engage with the positive energy before I kick start an awesome day.

 

What is your secret of calming down and regain focus when you are going through an emotional roller-coaster? Would love to hear more about how you cope with you down time, so can all learn from each other.

4evajessie@gmail.com

36 Comments

  1. Reply

    Deddeh Howard

    May 31, 2017

    What a great post, you are such a beauty soul. I meditate as well every morning and it just makes life so much easier and happier. Keep being strong love.

  2. Reply

    KATE TIK

    May 31, 2017

    I have always suffered from anxiety and some depression, but I now realize I just have to focus on the present and make it the best that I can make it. Thank you so much for sharing this.

    katetik.com

  3. Reply

    marcy

    May 25, 2017

    Yes, I have been feeling to overwhelmed lately with my life that I actually would love to try to meditate. I honestly don’t do it at all but for sure will give ir a try and I’m also considering doing some social media detox soon. Thank you very much for the advice babe

    xoxo
    Marcy

  4. Reply

    Jenn Hanft

    May 25, 2017

    Thank you for this post! I really need to start meditating again because I’m feeling all types stressed, depressed, and just burned out. I think a big thing that helps me calm down is reading a book, listening to music, and writing. Writing I think is the biggest step to figuring out the triggers and working on toning them down! Hopefully we can both get to a calm state asap.

    With love, Jenn
    https://www.jubilantdose.com

  5. Reply

    Lily Rose

    May 25, 2017

    Such a beautiful post about bringing self awareness back to the present and literally calm the fxxx down! I’ve been getting so stressed anxious lately, so I’m glad you brought up meditation. On top of anxiety, I also experience headaches (caused by hormones since I’m pregnant) and I think being anxious doesn’t help the situation. So I actually did try meditation the other day. I practice it via the Calm app, and just love how simple a little 20 min a day can change the attitude I have towards my day. Doing it in the morning is a great way to start the day, but my headache usually comes after lunch so I schedule mine for the afternoon. I also try yoga, not the intense one, just simple breathing and small movements and it helps a lot with calming the mind.
    Love your photos and the shots you take here in this post too, such amazing shots!

    -Lily from With Love Lily Rose

  6. Reply

    Sheree

    May 25, 2017

    I find that when I am overwhelmed or feeling anxious about things, I go for a drive. There is something so calming about letting the windows down, opening up the sun roof of my car and just coast along the PCH. I drive up the canyons or to Malibu and sit high up and look down at the ocean waves. It just instantly calms my nerves. Not sure if the problem would be solved automatically but my mood would be much better. Gorgeous photos Jessie, I love the clear blue sky with fluffy clouds.

    xo Sheree
    PoshClassyMom.com

  7. Reply

    Ana Vukosavljevic

    May 25, 2017

    This was such a great post Jessie! I like to write things down, to write about what I’m grateful for, what am I worring about and most importantly it helps me a lot to talk with someone I trust 100% sister, boyfriend or best friend and excercing as well.

  8. Reply

    Maryam

    May 25, 2017

    I’m glad I read your post. I’ve been feeling very overwhelmed recently that I almost feel hopeless. It’s funny that you mentioned those meditation apps, because prior to ready your post I had downloaded mindfulness, but to be honest I never used it. Now I’m determined and I’m going to start tonight. Thanks for the inspiration.

    xx, Maryam
    http://www.glamandposh.com

  9. Reply

    Andreea Birsan

    May 25, 2017

    It makes me happy to see you chose to talk about this topic. During these days, depression and anxiety are so common and sadly many people don’t know how to treat neither of them. As you pointed out, we will first have to identify the problem which is pressing us and then meditate. After all, meditation is the key to inner peace :). Wishing you a great day! xx

    Andreea,
    http://couturezilla.com/

  10. Reply

    Everest

    May 24, 2017

    Thanks for putting this together Jessie, i have been wanting to try some meditation on my own but sometimes i end up dozing off. thanks for sharing the popular apps as i think it would be very helpful for beginners like me since it is so easy to get started on it.
    I love how you benefited from it and I cant wait to share with you what it does for me soon.

    kisses
    Everest
    http://www.everestsays.com

  11. Reply

    Open Kloset

    May 24, 2017

    Hey Darling:)
    Hows you?
    This is soo Amazing Darling, I do meditations Every Day, And totally relate to this post.
    The best Solution for Stress and Depression is Meditation, Exercise for me, for example:)
    Loved the Apps and they are sooo Amazing:)
    This idea just Amazing and soo Helpful:)
    Everyone should try:)
    Love Open Kloset By Karina
    Happy Week 🙂

  12. Reply

    Aurela

    May 24, 2017

    I suffer so much from anxiety and sometimes I do experience anxiety attacks quite often. I’ve tried to meditate but I can’t seem to concentrate and let go. My mind goes to so many direction and I have a hard time to stay still and focus. Yoga keeps me calm and I practice 3-4 times a week. I love how athletic you are. Thank you for sharing this post with us, is very important to remind yourself to just relax and take a break from everything!
    Aurela xoxo
    http://www.aurelafashionista.com

  13. Reply

    Kierra

    May 24, 2017

    I’ve heard so many good things about meditation and I have yet to try it. I feel like I get so stressed, because I never have enough time. How am I going to make time to meditate? It all goes hand and hand, I seem to always be behind anymore. Life has been extremely difficult lately and I’m balancing so much. I need to get a set routine down so I can get my life track. I’m still learning how to get my life together…lol… so I am no help to this question.

    I do know working out is a big helper for me and I need to get more on a schedule. Eat, sleep, repeat kind of schedule.

  14. Reply

    Vanessa Berlin

    May 24, 2017

    I found this post very informative! Love it and I really understand what are you talking about. Because I have three kids so I’m a working mom and sometimes to the hectic pace of life I feel completely overwhelming and without a doubt meditation could be a wonderful medicine for the soul. The important point is that I need to schedule a time on my daily agenda to enjoy meditation. I already downloaded the apps that you have recommended here. I will try and I’ll let you know how is everything after practice meditation.
    Thanks for sharing!
    Vanessa

    http://thefashionstatement.net

  15. Reply

    Amy

    May 24, 2017

    I really needed this! Meditation is such a lifesaver, the benefits are truly endless. Thanks for sharing this Jessie 🙂

    xx, Amy
    http://www.theluxilook.com

  16. Reply

    Aimara

    May 24, 2017

    Ok, you had me just by reading the tittle.
    Thank you so much for sharing this. I’m going through a lot right now and definitely needed to read this! I think I’m going through both, anxiety and depression, even though it’s hard to admit publicly. I’ve tried everything, but I haven’t meditated in a while, so I’m definitely going back to it.
    Just downloaded the ‘calm’ app and lets see how it goes!
    Thank you so much for sharing!
    XO
    Aimara
    http://www.waysofstyle.com

  17. Reply

    Wanderlustts

    May 24, 2017

    This is so ironic because just earlier today I Was looking up Anger Management for a close friend of mine who really needs the help. A lot of what I found was related to how to cope with anger, and just as with stress and anxiety in your post, meditation was a key component to dealing with this. It has shown great results in changing the way you think and react in life. I actually use to meditate a few years back but I guess in recent years I’ve haven’t had the stress in my life to keep me from up keeping it.
    This was definitely a very interesting read that I thought was very useful for my own application Jessie! Thank you

    Wanderlustts
    http://www.wanderlustts.com

  18. Reply

    Gail

    May 23, 2017

    Meditating always help me calm..at least for minutes, but that works! Sometimes, my feelings can be in a turmoil state, so walking alone also helps! Love the article girl!

    http://www.thequinoxfashion.com

  19. Reply

    Helen Chik

    May 22, 2017

    Meditating is actually so good for the mind or even just practice deep breathing tends to help calm the mind and I love how we’ve both chosen to write about the same thing in the same week!

    Helen xx
    http://helenchik.com

  20. Reply

    Candi

    May 22, 2017

    Omg your photos are amazing – were they taken in Iceland?! I love your tips about calming down – I’ve been so wound up the past 1 year, and I’ve recently started using Essential Oils and I found that they really do help calming me, making me feel better, and they smell so good! Meditation is definitely on my list in the future too, but I’m taking baby steps 🙂

    Glad this worked for you babe xx

    XO Candi
    thelollychase.com

  21. Reply

    Adela

    May 22, 2017

    Your pictures are stunning babe! Thank you for this post. I also love meditating on a daily basis.

    Adela
    http://www.hautespark.com/

  22. Reply

    Britta

    May 21, 2017

    Babe these photos are beyond beautiful! Everything looks so peaceful! It is so important to relax and recharge with all the stress our everyday lives can bring.

  23. Reply

    Candace

    May 21, 2017

    As I’ve matured, I’ve figured out that worrying solves nothing and only causes more stress and unnecessary health issues. It’s much better to leave it to God, as He’s the controller of our destinies anyway. When I get overly stressed, I like to head to the gym or out for a run. I end up burning extra calories this way, which is always nice 🙂

    http://www.thebeautybeau.com

  24. Reply

    Samantha Mariko

    May 21, 2017

    I’ve never really tried meditation regularly, but many of my friends practice it and recommend it to me. It’s easy for me to feel stress since I never have real breaks from work, so this might be the answer!
    http://www.samanthamariko.com

  25. Reply

    Gracie

    May 21, 2017

    I use to be so stressed with school, blogging, studying, and on and on. I start my day around 5:30 and I go exercise first. This seems to clear my mind and I am able to cope with most anything thrown.my way. Without exercise and eating healthily I could not get through the day. Thank for sharing.

    Xxgracie

    snappedbygracie.com

  26. Reply

    Jordan Chapman

    May 21, 2017

    I’ve gone through a bunch of emotional rollercoasters lately, but what’s been helping me is to take a moment to myself and breathe. Deep breathing like I would after a long run has been great and so helpful in getting me to calm down!
    Jordan xx
    http://thehatlogic.com

  27. Reply

    Thomas Falkenstedt

    May 21, 2017

    I can second every single thing you wrote here. Having suffered from anxiety attacks for years I’ve had to give up a lot of things in life and reorganize the way I live in order to do things, such as actually getting enough sleep and not drinking caffeine. Sad but true. To me meditation is the key and I meditate both in the morning and before I go to bed at night.
    Thank you for sharing a post about something so important!
    Love,
    Thomas

  28. Reply

    Diana

    May 20, 2017

    Thanks for sharing, what a great post definitely will help out to other people.

    ps: I did use mindfulness app and i love it

    xx, Queen

    http://www.queenhorsfall.com/

  29. Reply

    Eva

    May 20, 2017

    Thank you dear for this post very useful. We have all a frenetic life and sometimes doesn’t think to meditate because I have a lot to do. But your avice is welcome and I will download the app so I can organized me at my home or outside. Usually to calming down I’m going to running or swimming 😉
    Xx
    Éva

  30. Reply

    Bernice

    May 20, 2017

    Headspace is so good! They provide a lot of mediattaion and relaxation exercises that pretty much everyone at my workplace uses to relax. We even have time after lunch to just relax before we keep working 🙂

    https://www.bunnybernice.com/single-post/2017/05/20/Honest-Review-of-Romwe-Everything-Wrong-1

  31. Reply

    Jessi Malay

    May 20, 2017

    Yesss girlie! Sometimes we all just ready need to take a breath and calm down haha! LOVE these photographs by the way… absolutely gorgeous! <3

    XO Jessi,
    http://www.mywhitet.com/travel-beauty-essentials/

  32. Reply

    Jo

    May 20, 2017

    I use Calm at least once a day. It’s guided meditation exercises have really helped to keep my stress levels down. Calm has several great “sleep stories” too. I fall asleep within minutes of listening to one of those.

    xo, Jo
    http://www.cutandchic.com

  33. Reply

    Christine Kong

    May 20, 2017

    I think we all go through some sort of anxiety and craziness especially in this fast-paced life we live. It’s important to take a step back and relax and meditation is something I have always heard but not necessarily believed in doing. It’s hard for my mind not to wander about all my to do lists and so I haven’t tried meditating before, but you are convincing me to try it. Usually for me I relax by just talking it through with my hubbie. Most of the time the things we fret about aren’t really even major in the grand scheme of things. Love all these beautiful photos Jessie! xoxo, Christine
    http://dailykongfidence.com/hourglass-cosmetics/

  34. Reply

    Amanda

    May 20, 2017

    When I read your title I immediately thought to be in the present moment! Even though we know that, it’s really difficult sometimes because …LIFE! We are always busy and have so many task to accomplish in the day BUT you are right in the fact that we have to focus on the present because there is only so much we can do at once. My mind is always trying to check things off the list and figure out what the quickest and most effective way there is to do that and so it wanders some times! For me prayer helps and only allowing my brain to focus on one particular task at a time! Being intentional is key! I’ve never meditated, but those that do really agree in the fact that it’s really helpful in aligning them!

    Great post!

    Manda | http://EvocativelyChosen.com

  35. Reply

    Sharon Wu

    May 20, 2017

    So glad you wrote this post babe! Lately I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed with life too and it’s always nice to just be able to retreat and relax a bit to get my life back on track. These days I’ve been going out to the pool and relaxing there to recollect myself. It’s been quite calming and I find myself able to pick up where I left off and be productive again. I’ve tried meditating too and while it’s not my preferred method I know it works really well for some people including my mom! Great read Jessie! xo, sharon

    http://www.stylelullaby.com/personal/life-update-10-things/
    @stylelullaby

  36. Reply

    Mariann Yip

    May 19, 2017

    I found this post so helpful! I get overwhelmed every now and then and I think it’s normal but it’s nice to be reminded to just relax and take a break!

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